Don't Marry An Air Force Pilot

        Sharing an old write up I did many years back when the kids were babies, and we were still residing inside the Sangley Air Base in Cavite City. My husband was an Air Force Pilot then. Even after he was already out of the service, he was given the Haribon Award for successfully fulfilling his missions in one of the Alumni Homecoming events. Now he works as a corporate pilot for Vibrant Earth Movers Inc., and is one of the founding members of the Mindanao Saga Flying Club. I have four children now. The twins RV and Monique are 23 years old already. RV now has a private pilot's license and working on his commercial license. Monique is studying Law. Ian, 22, is graduating soon with an IT course. Also into flying like his dad and older brother. The youngest, Angelique, 21, finished her Political Science Course, and about to take a basic management course at the Asian Institute of Management. 

        I now work as a City Councilor of Davao City.  Whenever I come across this article, it never fails to bring back a lot of good memories. Those where pretty challenging times too, for a young wife and mother back then. I thank God with all my heart for His steadfast love and guidance all the way. And so, my dear husband Rey and I, will be celebrating 25 years of marriage this year, yes! It must be love, no? There are so many stories to tell in that journey too. I hope to write about this and that. One day. Some day. (",)

        This was first published in 1991, and re-published again, some years back in the PAF ACes yearbook. Thanks to Maj. Li-an dela Cruz Busto for giving me a copy of the article.

------------

DON’T MARRY AN AIR FORCE PILOT

BY :  M A B E L   A C O S T A

ABOUT THE AUTHOR The writer is a UP Mass Communication graduate and a former newscaster/reporter of ABC-CBN TV-4 Davao.  She is now wife to CAPT. REYNALDO T. ACOSTA and mother of fraternal twins RV and Monique and to month-old Rey Ian.

   
    I t all started at the flight line at CASF XI. My colleague Tina Junsay, and I were to cover their CIVAC together with an NGO that would distribute food and medicine and give free medico-dental service to the T-boli’s at the foot of Mt. Apo. This was organized by Inday Arcenas and then Lt.Col. Imperio.

        Never In my wildest dream did I imagine myself married to a military man. I, a regular of marches, political rallies and symposia during my university days never had amour for the Armed Forces ever. Believe you me. Yet there I was, strapped in my seat, excited and airborne. My first chopper ride. My first out-of-town coverage. The first time we met.

        More chopper and out-of-town coverages followed. Between flights we exchanged green jokes, bragged of our exploits, explained each other’s work, laughed, argued, and ate their favorite Japanese food (READ: sardinas e.g. Hakata, Hakone, etc).

        One time, when I was about to get off the aircraft, the crew chief above the din of the aircraft’s engine and blades, handed me his clipboard and said, “Tinatanong ni Sir ang phone number mo at address.” Siempre, trying to be coy, I gave our station’s address and phone number instead. Next time around he asked me personally, and again, I only gave the other office number. Aba, after office hours, he showed up together with an underclass, and insisted to bring me home. The rest, as they say, is history.

        Before I knew it, he already brought me to Sangley, pregnant, and traversing three floors of the BOQ.

I tell you – whatever glamour you would imagine there is, in marrying an Air Force pilot, ends at the wedding where you are afforded the traditional flower drop or cross sword rites. Then your misadventures begin.

        When you’re an Air Force wife, there would be times that you just might be diagnosed as slightly schizophrenic. Not of the “Brenda” type. God forbid, but more of the classic multi-personality disorder. The likes of Mother Theresa, Cleopatra, and Wonder Woman rolled into one.
        Each time your husband goes out that door to fly his mission, you pray he comes right back that same door in a vertical position, at least eager to hug and kiss you, preferably, with a “pasalubong”. But more often than not he comes back tired, sometimes smelling odd, like smoke, or gas, or something else. He plants a routine smack on the lips, lunges for the botaka and lets out a litany of how tiring, or boring, or horrifying his mission was. And funny how the story usually ends with him becoming short of a hero.

        No matter if the night before you had an argument and are not on speaking terms, somehow you go through the motions of patching things up before he leaves for deployment early the next morning. Not even hurt pride or the meanest temper stops you from bargaining with the Lord to “Bring him back home safe, please”.

        And when he does, he often goes, how’re the kids, what’s the news, etc. before he remembers the how are you part.

        When he’s on deployment, you better remind him to advise Finance not to send his salary and flying pay on deployment too.  Pray your kids don’t get sick while he’s away. You’ll either worry be might worry or complain why he seems to make nothing of it.

        You have to have the patience of Job if you ever attempt to contact him through a military line. If you don’t have the good fortune of owning a direct dial mode (which is most likely) you have to pass through various operators who sound like you have to thank them for answering the phone, only to inform you the line is busy. And if you happen to come to catch him at the other end, better say your piece “ala motormouth” before the line’s cut off.

        There will be times too when he goes out for the ultimate seduction scenario. He expects you to be the loving and and sensual wife that you are and give him a well-deserved break every after a very hectic day. A message perhaps, a caress, a VIP treatment? Good if you’re in the mood. But after a taxing day at the office or a problematic day in the house, it’s so hard to set your mind to it. Somehow he misses the point that wives do get tired and they work so hard.

        When he’s away, you’re Daddy and Mommy to your kids. You’re doctor, nurse, teacher, playmate, shock-absorber, interpreter, police, confidante, and referee to your children too.

You’re pseudo-electrician, plumber, gardener, carpenter too. That’s aside from being cook, laundrywoman, cleaning lady, and a magician. You exert tremendous effort trying to make heads or tails of the meager budget he hands over, then you marvel at how you managed to apportion it somehow. But with the prices of goods and the increasing consumption of your household, you turn incredulous as your husband turns purple the way money disappears before you know it.

Times are when some wise guy calls up to inform your husband the guy supposed to be on duty’s absent so he’s it. On a Sunday, mind you.

        Or he calls up from deployment to tell you he’s coming home but gives you a no-show because the aircraft he’s supposed to board has no fuel, or operations suddenly require him to extend his stay.

        He expects you to be snappy too when it comes to being on time, when he’s interrogating, or when he’s giving instructions. Take it easy on your coffee or you just might catch yourself barking a “Yes, sir!”

         An Air Force wife’s life is not so easy. You have to have the resourcefulness of McGyver, the graciousness of McEnroe, the entrepreneurship of McDonald, and the philosophy of a Cheshire cat.

         So if that dashing pilot starts buzzing by your house and woos you, collect yourself and don’t come running to me for advice. For I will categorically tell you – don’t marry an Air Force Pilot.

Look for a man who is serious about his career and dedicated to his profession, but still manages to be a family man. Someone who makes time for the children. One who, after ridding himself of gripes, still remembers to appreciate your role as a wife and mother. One who makes an effort to make up with his wife for the nature of his job.

           Don’t marry an Air Force Pilot.

           Marry the man you love.

           Just like I did.

KAPAMILYA RUN

BANTAY BATA 163 DAVAO TAKBO PARA SA BATA

More than 800 running enthusiasts participated Bantay Bata's "Takbo Para Sa Bata" Fun Run last October 26, 2008, Sunday, in support of Bantay Bata, as well as other NGO's advocating children's rights call to stop corporal punishment against children. The participants include, among others, employees from the local government (including the staff of Councilor Mabel Sunga Acosta who participated in full force), members of the Philippine National Police, members of non-governmental organizations, members of the academe, as well as other people coming from all walks of life.

The categories were, 2K for children 12 years and below, 5K for children and adults, and there is also the wheelchair category for those who are differently abled individuals. Aside from the fun run which is the main event, other activities like magic shows and raffle events were also staged by the organizers from Bantay Bata.

Bantay Bata hopes to continue this annual fun run event, which is now on its sixth year, to advocate for the protection of children's rights, among others.

Bantay Bata 163 is a non-stock/non-profit non-government organization (NGO) whose primary aim is to provide care and welfare to children who were victims of abuses in any form.

M@YS Participates in ABS-CBN Kalusugan Patrol

Mabel At Your Service-DXAB was one of the sponsors in Kalusugan Patrol conducted last August 30, 2008 at Magallanes Elementary School gym. The said activity was organized by ABS-CBN Davao in celebration of its 20th Anniversary. Medical and dental services were rendered by volunteer doctors, nurses and dentists to residents of the school's neighboring areas.

Bantay Bata 8th Year Anniversary

Last August 26, 2008, Bantay Bata 163 Davao celebrated its 8th Anniversary at Monteritz Club House. Councilor Mabel Sunga Acosta gave the Opening Remarks and delivered the message of Mayor Rodrigo Duterte.

It was also the Donor's Night where the Foundation extends its warm thanksgiving to individuals, companies, and organizations, who shared their resources to the betterment of the children under the care of BB163 Davao. Other special guests were Ms. Trisha Corpus, the Station Manager of ABS-CBN Davao and a member of the BB163 Board of Advisers, Mr. Ryan Kim- a korean donor, and Wednesday Mothers.

Congratulations to Bantay Bata 163 Davao! =)

Councilor Acosta's June 17, 2008 Privilege Speech

Mr. President, my colleagues in the City Council. Friends from the media, ladies and gentlemen, Maayong buntag.

I rise on a personal and collective privilege to manifest my concern in connection with the abduction of ABS-CBN news journalist Ces Drilon, her crew Jimmy Encarnacion and Angelo Valderama, as well as Professor Octavio Dinampo, of Mindanao State University, a well-known peace activist.

Last June 8, 2008 the whole nation was stunned upon hearing of the news of the abduction of Ces, her crew and Prof. Dinampo. Mr. President, once again my fellow media practitioners' lives are in danger for the reason and practice of their profession.

Mr. President, this is not the first time that journalists from ABS-CBN were abducted by the Abu Sayyaf. The same incident happened in July 2000, when ABS-CBN reporter Maan Macapagal and cameraman Val Cuenca were abducted and were held in captivity for four (4) days. Also other local journalists from GMA-7 like Carlo Lorenzo, Susan Enriquez and cameraman Gilbert Ordiales were likewise abducted and held in captivity for a number of days. However, their plight is nothing compared to then Philippine Daily Inquirer contributor and Net 25 television reporter Arlyn de la Cruz, who was held in captivity for over 3 months.

The abduction of Ces Drilon and her crew adds another fatal blow to the tarnished image of the Philippines as a place unsafe for journalists. It could be recalled that not so long ago, the Philippines was put in a spotlight in the international arena for a series of journalist killings. These killings were primarily intended to silence our media practitioners in telling the truth to the people as vanguards of democracy.

According to a report from the National Union of Journalists of the Philippines (NUJP) presented to the National Media and Conflict Summit in Jakarta, Indonesia on 26 April 2006:

"Mindanao recorded the most number of slain journalists in the country. The International Federation of Journalists tagged the Philippines as the second most dangerous country for journalists, next to Iraq where war rages. Journalists in the provinces, like us who are based in Mindanao, are facing direct risks compared with those based in Manila. Stories which were unpleasant for some local government officials and the politicians resulted to threats, harassments and worst, the killings of journalists".

In the local scene, our very own Gene Boyd Lumawag is in that long list of victims, among others. In another news item, Mr. President, as many as 88 journalists have been killed since 1986; the year formal democracy was restored in the Philippines. The number is now close to double the number of journalists in 14 years of martial law, the NUJP said in a statement.

The issue on the killing of the journalists and their protection continue to remain unresolved. We know from the fact that the Congress already passed a law pertaining to Anti-terrorism Act. But still lives are put in danger.

This latest incident should be a wake-up call not only for journalists in the field nor media owners but the government as well.

Allow me also to speak this time as a mother and a citizen of this country and not just as an elected official and media practitioner. Journalists are not only dedicated human beings out in search of truth for public interest. They are also strong indicators of a strong democracy. If our journalists here in the Philippines or in the world are killed, threatened or abducted, then democracy itself is placed in great peril.


Murder, imprisonment and threats against journalists constitute a grave violation against the freedom of expression – and thus also threaten the fundamentals of democracy. Impunity only makes the situation worse. As long as perpetrators know that they will not be held accountable for the crimes they have committed, journalists remain easy targets.

Let not this incident be viewed as a Muslim-Christian conflict, neither as a mere Mindanao peace and order problem. This is an incident that should unite all peace-loving citizens of the country and this world, and should be regarded in the larger concept of keeping the peace in a civilized society.

Kidnapping of any peace-loving citizen, for that matter, should be condemned and dealt with severely. Kidnapping for ransom is worse, holding hostage an innocent victim, its family, the community, the country, event the world, which is already teetering in various natural and man-made calamities. Abduction has already become on enterprise for this splinter group, and has gone beyond whatever principles it was supposed to further.

This abduction should be dealt as a criminal act and should be dealt with accordingly. The latest turn of events has it, as publicized in a national daily, that kidnappers are setting a deadline at twelve noon today for the pay of some Php15M for the release of the three (3) remaining captives. This is indeed very unfortunate, as it should have been the government and its proper agencies that should be giving an ultimatum to criminal elements like these abductors.

I call upon all peace-loving citizens, whether Muslim or Christian, regardless of race, creed, or color, to condemn all criminal acts, especially heinous acts such as kidnap for ransom activities. I also urge the peace-loving Muslim leaders of our country, to come out in the open to condemn these acts that unfortunately undermine the collective desire of all for peaceful coexistence. The government, and all citizens, should make all effort to stop this incident from happening again and again.
In the end, all acts of criminal intent do not only adversely and directly affect the victim, or his or her family, or the community, or the country, or the world, but the entire consciousness of the human race. If there is no respect for human life and human aspirations that is inherent in each and every one of us, peace and stability are the very ideals that are curtailed.

Let us stop killing, threatening and abducting journalists and all innocent civilians for that matter. Unabated, these threatens the very pillars of democracy and our sense of decency as a civilized as a civilized society. Let us all join hands in offering our prayers for the safety of the captives and their rescuers. And also prayers for our beloved country and its leaders in these very challenging times.

Thank you, Your Honor.

MABEL SUNGA ACOSTA